When you feel you are fighting alone

We as human beings thrive in connection with others. We were not created to be alone. The legendary poet John Donne said it best when he stated, "No man is an island unto himself" Based on this sentiment, it becomes wildly evident that we as living, breathing human beings were created to share an interdependent existence based on love, mutuality, and togetherness. Usually these things are found within our families and circle of friends. Those who we call our "kin" and "close knit friends" are charged with the responsibility to provide the love, support, and nurture necessary to grow.

But what happens when you have to go it alone? When you have no family or friends you can count on for support? What do you do when you are out here fighting alone?

As you engage in the very purposeful yet terrifying work of supporting yourself, remember you know how to be alone. You have done it so many times before. When you were first being formed in your mother's strong womb, you were alone. When you were resting in your crib at night as a small child at the beginning stages of your life, you were growing alone. When you were playing in your room, sometimes you were in the company of one. Other times you just had you and your imagination to rely on. You know how to be alone. You already have a repertoire of flying solo. The blueprint on how to be alone has already been formed.

Keep in mind that you are not alone in being alone. Many people feel the same way you do and have no friends or family to rely on too. They have used the time to build their own empires. They have used the time to discover who they are, what they enjoy, what they want, how best they can support themselves irrespective of having family, friends or a life partner.

They have also learned to draw on various sources of motivation from books, nature and a meaningful relationship with their higher power. They have collected concrete tools, namely quotes, affirmations, and sayings that keep them regularly motivated. They have looked in their mirror and engaged in what is known as "power posing." They stand tall inside themselves and hold poses that reflect their inner strength and the person they wish to project to the world. They become the change they wish to see and engage in this self-defining choreography and realize they have everyone they need right inside of them.