Empathy is the medicine that the world needs
For the last few years, lives and understanding among people have blurred to a considerable extent. Stress levels have increased so much that there is hardly any scope for empathy and understanding. People have forgotten to gauge the strengths and weaknesses, problems and difficulties of fellow beings. Anything can be achieved with empathy. It needs to be positioned in the driver’s seat. It is a skill that you need to often nourish and nurture. Statements that empathize with different age groups and different natures need to be used keeping in mind the time and situation. The nature of humanity and its essence is to feel another’s pain as one’s own, and step in to wipe out that pain. Compassion for others is what makes our life more humane. Afterall, there is nobility in compassion, beauty in empathy and grace in forgiveness. The foremost among all traits is in understanding oneself first.
Being empathetic is not easy. Tremendous vulnerability is required to give a patient hearing to other person’s woes. Put yourself in his or her shoes to understand struggles. Sometimes being empathetic becomes uncomfortable, especially when you are supporting someone in a dark time. Empathy is all about listening to another person’s pain and sharing their difficult thoughts and feelings. Someone lacking empathy may not be able to understand why another person is upset over a situation.
People with suicidal tendencies express loneliness and pain through their words and actions. The feeling that no one can help them out and resolve their problems engulfs them. When a conversation is dealt with empathetically, it lessens their feelings of being understood and judged. You need to make them understand that no one is immune to challenges. Let them understand that we are so different from others. The realization can be communicated to your loved ones and relieve them from the pain. In this way you are inviting them into your inner world. Empathy creates connection and understanding. This connection and understanding encourages those struggling with mental health to seek help and support from their peers, particularly those whom they can confide in. We reflect on what they are feeling and provide a safe space for all emotions, even the negative ones. Empathy comes straight from the heart.
When we are trying to be empathetic to a person and are genuinely interested in helping, we need to keep a few things in mind. A person who pours out his heart or mind is at the most vulnerable phase and makes him seek help. Listen carefully and patiently and understand what the other person is trying to say. Connecting with them in their thoughts is vital. You need to give your undivided attention to the seeker. Face them with hands still and look into the eyes. Avoid distractions like phone, TV, or other people so that you don’t miss out on important emotional outpourings. Abstain from advising. Let the person talk, let the emotions be vented out and let him or her come out with their own conclusions. It gives them a feeling that they are not hopeless and can find their own solution. If you have a similar experience, share it so that the person does not feel alone. Being supportive, understanding, and compassionate are the building blocks of preventive care for all individuals, both young and old.
Demonstrating empathy in the classroom allows teachers to recognize the feelings of their students and themselves without lowering expectations. Practicing empathy in the classroom is not always easy to respond to student behavior with empathy. But to some extent listening and hearing actively, withholding judgement, trying to be understanding and demonstrating empathetic body language will help to a certain extent. You build mutual trust and rapport when you show students you understand and respect their feelings. Every parent must realise that children aged between 15 and 17 years need empathy, not pressure. Forcing them into specific subjects or courses can backfire. Today’s teens are aware, sensible, so let them have a say. The world is right in front of them at the click of a button. Not every child is cut out for technical or medical courses. Some will suffocate in classrooms for 12 to 14 hours a day. Have you ever seen a perfect product from a factory turn out flawed? It is ditto with kids—no resources will help if they are not into it. They need understanding, care, and space. Their minds are quite fragile after all. Don’t push them to a breaking point. Handle with empathy.
The story of domestic abuse is not uncommon. It prevails in society like a virus and leaves destruction, fear and sadness in its wake. Given its prevalence, it is likely that you will know someone who is going through it and may need your moral support. Through empathy, you can help feel and better understand those undergoing abuse. All too often, domestic abuse survivors endure years of frustration and bottled-up pain. However, when another person stands with them in their experience of old or new injury, they can walk through it. It all starts with attention.
When one is seen and heard by another, they can be more honest with themselves, and this attention can probably boost the healing process. As a friend you have the power to help and bring about transformation through empathy. Sometimes the strongest among us are the ones who smile through pain, cry behind closed doors and fight battles that nobody knows about.
As people grow older, they become increasingly vulnerable, and their needs increase. They don’t want to be seen as a burden, feel uncomfortable switching roles from a caregiver to being under a caretaker. Sometimes it becomes extremely difficult for elderly people to explain their needs to family and friends. They make best efforts to tackle their own problems, be it financial or health issues, to avoid being a burden to others. As they are reluctant to ask for help, we must be watchful and look for signs of a problem. We must be ready to help, sometimes before help is sought.
Our loved ones want us to be on their side when they are in distress and want us to be their strength when they need it most. Listening to them and talking in soft voices while showing our concern is of prime importance. Offer them help, but back off and don’t push when help is being refused.
Allowing them to do what they can do allows them to maintain their dignity. Quality of life and dignity are very important for them. Just by being patient and taking things easy solves many problems.
Empathy is like a universal solvent, any problem immersed in it becomes soluble. Examine your own attitude and keep an open mind. Placing too much emphasis on your own assumptions and beliefs does not leave much space for empathy. Remember empathy is not about what you want, but what the other person craves for. Before you criticize or pass comments on someone, walk a mile in their shoes. You will realize that deep within, they are very uncomfortable. Learn to walk next to each other. Any action you take or suggest must benefit the person. Every situation is unique; there is no single solution for everyone.
Learning to stand in somebody else’s shoes, to see through their eyes, is how peace begins. And it’s up to you to make that happen. Empathy is a quality of character that can change the world-Barack Obama.
