How to get along with your sibling

Make a conscious decision to let go

The downside of having a shared history is that one or both of you might be holding on to grievances or nursing a grudge. For example, perhaps you have always thought your sister was your mom's favourite, or still feel annoyed when you think about how mean she was to you as a teen. If you are serious about improving your relationship, you need to accept that you can't change the past. Let go of petty grudges and resentment

Offer your help and support on a regular basis

In many respects, a good sibling relationship is like a friendship. You offer your friends plenty of support, so why not extend the same treatment to your sister? She might be a relative, but that doesn't mean you should take her for granted. If your relationship is unbalanced, it's inevitable that one or both of you will end up feeing resentful. Don't just call or write when you want a favour!

Always invite them to take part in your celebrations and big events

Make your sister feel included in your life. For instance, invite them to your child's first birthday party, your spouse's retirement party, your first big cookout of the summer, and so on. She might not always want to attend, but she will appreciate the invitation.

Be willing to move beyond old family roles and labels

Most of us are given labels by our parents and siblings, and these can shape our identities. For instance, you may have been "the smart one," your sister might have been "the sporty one," your brother might have been "the naughty one," and so on. It can be frustrating when our family still cast us in these roles as adults.

Show your sister that you appreciate her as a well-rounded individual. The downside of having a shared history is that one or both of you might be holding on to grievances or nursing a grudge. For example, perhaps you have always thought your sister was your mom's favorite, or still feel annoyed when you think about how mean she was to you as a teen.

If you are serious about improving your relationship, you need to accept that you can't change the past. Let go of petty grudges and resentment.

Offer your help and support on a regular basis:

In many respects, a good sibling relationship is like a friendship. You offer your friends plenty of support, so why not extend the same treatment to your sister?