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You had your breakfast in the morning
"You had your breakfast in the morning. I remember I gave you roti, I specially keep it for you because you are fond of it. You landed early for lunch today. Are you hungry or are you here for time pass with me? Either way I am happy to see you. ".
"Why, no response from you? you too don't like to talk to me like many. Come on we are friends, Tweety. You can't ditch your friend. I know getting older is the worst thing in the world, but it certainly doesn't have to be. There are plenty of reasons to be positive about old age. Old age brings new opportunities with a great mix of wisdom and humour. It's a record of one 's whole life. Don't regret growing older. It's a privilege denied to many. Don't look at me with those pitiful eyes. You must have come across many haggard, old, lonely women like me. So, you can understand the pain and agony I go through. By the way I always see you alone. Where is your partner? You lead a liberated life, I presume".
"I talk a lot, but you just nod, turn and twist but you don't speak. Any way let me make it clear to you. I am not ALONE. I have three very loving sons in U.S, very busy, earning in dollars. All three are engineers from very reputed colleges of the country, well settled. I have six grandchildren who I think love me a lot, but no time for them too".
"Hello are you listening to me or are you worried about your lunch"?
"We went to U.S 10 years ago. You know we means my husband and myself, but unfortunately, you know he is … I am … you can understand from the tears and choked throat, I feel he is lucky to have not seen all these problems. For some time, I was there but had to come back to settle a few things, you wouldn't understand about them. They are the materialistic things of the so called 'elite 'and 'cultured ' world. My sons promised to take me back after things were settled here. I settled them but they did not come back. I never knew that they planned to pack me off permanently. For one or two years they kept calling me at regular intervals, but slowly the time gap increased, and after some time the calls stopped. I don't remember their telephone numbers or their places of service or the cities they stay in. You know I have Alzheimer's disease. But I remember my dear sons' names, being a mother, I just can't forget them. Tweety don't look at me like that, yes, I have tears when I remember my Atul, Amit and Arun. We named them all with the first alphabet so that they are always in top positions in their lives. Every Sunday I wait for their call till I go to sleep. You know friend, just picking up the phone and calling old parents can make them happy for many days, I did not leave them when they were young, so why am I forgotten now? You see my friend Smita, always seen with her children's picture and shedding tears day in and day out. The other day I talked to you about Pushpa the tall, fair lady always well dressed and looking eagerly at the gate. She waits for her son to come and take her on Char Dham Yatra. That's what had been promised to her 5 years ago".
"Oh, I forgot to give you lunch, I was lost in my story and I think I bored you enough. Ok from tomorrow onwards I will not bore you with these sob stories. What if you too stop visiting me, I can't miss you friend".
"You know Tweety, it's not the fault of parents for getting old, and what had happened to them will happen to all eventually. Becoming elderly is just a natural ending process of life. You know friend how I landed here. One day I went to market and couldn't go back home. I was roaming aimlessly. Even today I can't recollect my place of stay. All my memories were left behind in that 'sweet' home. Sometimes some things come into my memory as flashes as if in dream and disappear before I could tell anyone. It's some good Samaritan who brought me to this home. 'Old Age Homes ' are Civilization's dump sites for human beings who it cannot exploit further".
" Are you still hungry or enough for today?" Oh, Tweety I forgot to tell you something. Listen to this, very interesting. My elder son always forgets things from childhood, now he forgot to build a room for me in his new bungalow. God forgive him for his forgetfulness. You know he told me 10 years ago that he would make a special room for me and then take me along, sadly that day hadn't come yet. He doesn't have any dementia like me but I don't know why he forgot, so is with the other two. Tweety, I realised of late that expectation is the root of all heart aches, what do you say"?
"Amma where are you? Again, on the terrace, talking to whom, your friend Tweety. I told you many times not to go up, you might trip on the steps and fall".
"Oh, Leela you love me so much, you leave your hectic kitchen work and come looking for me. You know cooking for 50 people is not easy. I know it, in my heydays supervising itself used to tire me out. Here in this 'old age home ', you actually cook according to the tastes of these oldies. Whatever possessions I have you take them, see with your loud calling, my friend Tweety flew away saying 'tweet, tweet'. You know, it recognises me and comes to say hello to me every day unlike my children, now I have to wait till tomorrow to see Tweety and talk to it. ------ After the work is over come to me, I will apply oil and comb your hair nicely. You are young and pretty. Do you have parents or in- laws at home"?
"Yes, Amma I have my in - laws with me and my parents a little away from where I stay. My dwelling is very small to accommodate so many of us. I am the only daughter and my husband is the only son. We can't leave any one.
"Oh, that's true, you know Leela even though people experiencing dementia become unable to recount what has just happened they still go through the experience of emotional pain caused by callous treatment or unkind talk and ----"
"Amma I am not as educated as you are, you must be well qualified, you talk like an intellectual, very different from others".
"Yes, Leela you are right, but you know --- parents are not around you forever, call them, visit them, take their grandchildren to see them, laugh with them, let them speak and tell you the same old stories over and over again, treat them with respect, patience and plenty of love, while they are still relatively healthy and of sound mind".
TOMORROW IT MIGHT BE TOO LATE.
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