Mind Your Language

Is it possible to look at the choice of vocabulary that seems to have crept into every aspect of society comic or otherwise, and watch what we are saying; writer, journalist reflects on our times when abuses have crept into popular culture and are hardly considered offensive

Growing up in a joint family my three sisters and I spent a lot of time with our grandfather who had plenty of things to teach us and patience to narrate stories that were the perfect antidote to fidgety and restless behaviour. One of the first lessons he taught us pertained to anger control and language. When we used words that failed to match his level of 'temperate usage" the one using the condemned word had to get up gargle her mouth and return to the teaching session suitably chastised and purified. The words that attracted this treatment were really harmless ranging from "stupid" "idiot" "useless" shameless" etc which by present day standards are utterly benign and lacking punch. "What the F…….? Is that an abuse? I can hear the present generation wonder aloud. So effective was my grandfather's punishment that to this day I watch my words and voice my opinion in the best possible way so as to refrain from hurting the sensibilities of the person I am addressing. Certainly, quaint and almost Victorian for the XYZ generation!!!

Standup comedy takes the cake in using expletives, innuendoes, sexually explicit expressions both oral and facial and I admit is quite creative and even funny despite the moments of embarrassment. Personally, I am quite petrified to see standup comics pick on the meekest among the audience and mercilessly rip them apart at live shows. That's why I feel watching them on Youtube or on television is much safer than going out there and becoming a possible scapegoat while those around seem to be lost in guffaws. I still remember the graphic description of a 'Russell Peters' show in Bangalore given by my friend where he apparently picked on an innocent old man from the audience and made him the butt of his irreverent jokes. Certainly, no live comedy I decided there and then as I have this unfortunate luck of being found in a crowd.

As the sandwich generation, watching comedy with both generations is an embarrassing ordeal but it's only me who is embarrassed. The older generation frankly doesn't understand half the stuff and the younger one couldn't care. For them the cuss words, the expletives, the bold scenes and violence are all normal, yes the new normal. Since the story line and presentation are interesting and I suffer from FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) I watch many new web serials through their seasons (by the time the 2nd season begins I would have forgotten the first which needs refreshing) and I must admit the' mother -sister abuses' so casually hurled, the way Indian small town youth converse and the chilling and realistic portrayals of bad people that seem to be omni present, is no pleasant experience. Is this the new reality the language interspersed with abuses? Are drugs, sex and crude portrayal of sadistic humans representing things as they are? As scenes get bolder and the language gets baser, I am stuck by the realization that fine emotions, fine language and all things fine are slowly becoming obsolete be it web shows, news debates or standup comedy gone wrong.

Cerebral stuff like language and manners, civility and subtle portrayal are alas a thing of the past. Despite the censoring at places courtesy the beeps, conversations laced with abuse causes a strange restlessness, an inexplicable sensation bordering somewhere between anxiety and fear. As a lover of beautiful words that remain with you long after they have been uttered, I am deeply disappointed with the crass, intemperate, base and meaningless ways in which they have crept into our social life. No wonder we have 'all in one comics' as the conscience of the nation today.

Don't mix bad words with your bad mood, goes a saying which truly tells us that we will have many opportunities to change a mood but never get one to replace words already spoken. The tongue does not have a bone and goes in all directions helping us whiplash people with our speech. What then should we do? One carelessly uttered word gets more than one in return and the sooner we become aware of what we say when we are blinded by anger the better. Discipline in speech surely reduces the turmoil and turbulence around us as we know too well that wordy duels are more damaging than physical ones. Physical wounds heal faster than words that pierce our hearts like arrows. Mind your language as words have more power than you think.