How to get full value for my vote

With elections fast approaching, Subbu was getting more and more agitated every day. I asked him what was eating him.

'Dude, I don't know who to vote for?' he said. 'I don't want to waste my valuable vote.'

'What's so difficult?' I said. 'Choose the candidate who will best fulfil your aspirations. Simple.'

'What's so simple?' asked Subbu. 'Have you found anyone who fulfilled your aspirations and dreams yet? In fact, have you found any goals and aspirations yet?'

'Err, umm,' I mumbled and changed the topic. 'Surely you will find someone. There are so many big leaders to choose from.'

'Not really,' he said. 'Everyday our big leaders are accusing each other of being liars and thieves, and of being responsible for corruption, poverty, terrorism, siding with the enemy and other unlawful activities. If it was you or me who was accused of such things, we would have been locked up for the next 10 lives. When they are certifying that they should all be in jail without exception, why waste my valuable vote on them? They could go to jail at any moment.'

'In that case, find someone about whom nothing is being said,' I said. 'A good person.'

'Yes, there are a few people about whom nothing is being said,' said Subbu. 'They don't even get their deposits back. No point in voting for them. I will get no value for my vote.'

'Vote for a candidate who is neither big enough to go to jail nor small enough to lose the deposit,' I suggested. 'The middle path.'

'There is a problem with these middle fellows,' said Subbu. 'After we vote for them, they join the party they earlier accused of being a gang of thieves. I don't want to vote for a thief-to-be.'

'Maybe they simply say stuff like that to get elected?' I said. 'Maybe they are not thieves really.'

'Why vote for them then?' asked Subbu. 'If they say stuff they don't mean.'

'You are right,' I said. 'Do one thing. Check their records. Nothing like hard facts and figures to verify what they did in the past to guide you in casting your valuable vote.'

'I checked,' said Subbu. 'For some candidates, criminal records showed up, and for some others, there are no tracks at all. Without exception they all made promises about creating jobs, removing poverty, terrorism and corruption. Now five years later, they are back with new promises about poverty, corruption and jobs.'

'It sure looks tricky,' I said. 'Who will you cast your valuable vote for then?'

'I see one possibility,' said Subbu. 'There is only one candidate who is genuinely interested and can make a difference to my life. What I like about him is that I can hold him accountable if he makes a promise to me and breaks it. I shall vote for him.'

'Who is that?' I asked surprised to find that Subbu knew such a great leader.

'Me, of course' said Subbu. 'If I contest and cast my precious vote for myself, I have voted for the one candidate who cares the most about me. If I don't deliver on my promises to myself, I am accessible anytime and I can beat myself properly for not delivering in return for my valuable vote.

A win-win-win situation; my vote is used well, I elect someone who is accountable to me and I get free anger therapy. I suggest you do this also.'

'Contest in elections?' I asked.

'No, beat yourself up,' he said. 'Even if you don't contest. It's what we fully deserve in return for casting our valuable vote.'