Compassionate Parenting: Navigating ADHD and Learning Challenges

Highly qualified parents, both working as teachers in prestigious schools, approached us with their sons who were displaying issues such as a lack of focus, poor academic performance, and mischievous and naughty behaviour. They narrated various challenges they’ve faced since their child was seven years old. Presently, he is in the 8th grade, having struggled immensely and attended numerous remedial classes to progress.

During their descriptions of the child’s misbehaviour, they admitted to physically punishing him severely on multiple occasions and withholding food to in still discipline. Despite their efforts, nothing seems to be effective. Even after facing consequences such as beatings and complaints from teachers, the child appears unfazed. He quickly reverts to normalcy, showing no remorse for his actions, leaving us perplexed and hopeless.

Following the advice of family members, the parents resorted to various religious rituals and fasting, but to no avail. They seek assistance, feeling lost and desperate.

Upon interaction with the parents and the boy and conducting assessments of his learning disabilities and behaviours, we discovered that he has ADHD coupled with a learning disability in academics (LDA). With the aid of a special educator, we provided training that helped him comprehend letters and significantly improved his writing, albeit at a slower pace. Additionally, behaviour modification techniques have positively influenced his conduct. Simultaneously, we provided training to the parents on effective parenting strategies tailored for children with these specific needs, emphasizing the importance of avoiding excessive expectations commonly imposed by societal norms.

Dear parents, if your children face behavioural or academic challenges, we strongly advise seeking professional help from a psychologist instead of resorting to unproductive disciplinary actions that could harm their self-esteem. Children diagnosed with ADHD, LDA, or Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD) often exhibit challenging behaviours that can disrupt home environments and stress parents. If your kid is experiencing these issues, please visit a psychologist without any delay.

Some of the behaviours of ADHD include:

• Running and shouting when playing, even indoors.

• Finding it hard to sit still.

• Fidgeting.

• Bumping into things because they move so fast.

• Tending to play too rough.

• Talking a lot (including blurting out answers and talking over others).

• Getting distracted easily.

• Finding it hard to finish tasks.

• Struggling to get or stay organised.

• Making simple mistakes because they rush.

• Often losing or forgetting where they put things.

(Dr C Veerender, counselling psychologist (www.younme.co)