Nothing is yours so, why fear loss?
We overcome the fear of loss by recognising that nothing was ours to begin with. The fear of loss is rooted upon the illusion that I actually still have something in my grip. If I've never had it, I'm not afraid of losing it. If I don't own anything, I'm not afraid of losing it… When we think about things more deeply, nothing is ours. Every single thing, every single person, every ability, is being lent to us.
Look just over the course of your life. We gain so much — you learn how to be a fantastic baseball player; you learn how to be a great this thing or that thing. Well, give it a few decades, let the normal course of life go on, and as the body starts to degenerate, well, you're no longer a fantastic baseball player.
We are so attached to our beauty, degrees, titles, and careers, but we lose those anyway. Even if nothing happened and we just simply got older. Everyone retires. Everyone's body starts to degenerate at pretty much the same rate. We lose them. The same is true if it's our money. We'll eventually lose it, whether we lose it now or whether we lose it when we pass over. It's out of our hands.
God may decide to give you a lesson a little bit earlier — the stock market might crash, something could happen. But that's just to teach you: "You thought it was yours, I needed to remind you. It was never yours." ....
This is true about every ability we have, every possession we own. It's also true about our relationships. Eventually, whether through divorce or through death, you're going to lose. It's sad, but until and unless we recognise that as an ultimate truth of life, we can't really live, because then we're grasping on.
The lesson it gives on how to move through this life on our path to enlightenment, rather than just how to deal with the fact that we're going to lose it, is to ask ourselves: what is it that I don't lose? If I'm going to lose everything including my loved ones, well then being attached to these things, attached to never losing them, you could say is a waste of energy, because ultimately, it's an exercise in futility. I am going to lose it.
So, the question then arises: What should I be attached to?... What is it that's not going to degenerate, what is it that's not going to divorce me or die? Again, it's the spiritual connection. It's the Divine. And here's what's beautiful: it's not the Divine as separate from your loved ones, it's the Divine through your loved ones, and existing in the natural world, and everywhere, because everything in the world is pervaded by the Divine....
The questions arise — can I shift, can I start to be connected to the spirit, the consciousness, the essence, the divine in that being? This is the only way that I have found to overcome that fear of loss...If the divine pervades everything, it means I have infinite opportunities to see the Divine and to connect with the Divine.
-Sadhvi Bhagawati Saraswati