Chaos & Conflict: Holding your own in their midst

Update: 2023-03-12 02:13 IST

Chaos & Conflict: Holding your own in their midst

Humans know one thing from the day they become aware of being in their bodies. And that one definitive thing is that life is constant change. When you look at this from any angle, we as humans are always aware that there is something that we don't know, or cannot foresee. The whole concept of being human is to experience ourselves as our lives unfold.

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As a result of this phenomenon, humans must always 'budget' or account for unforeseen or unpredictable events. We say "who knows what tomorrow will bring" when we plan for our future and other wishes, goals and aspirations. We also say, "life is what happens while you are making other plans." Thus, all humans have always planned for the future, based on the extent of that which they have experienced as a structure, or what's called the familiarity of experience.

As we grow older, we gradually become more capable of dealing with unknown territory, and so our confidence increases. But what few humans notice is, that they too tend to become set in their ways. And so, life becomes a constant. But only for some time. Then something happens, and you find yourself needing to adapt to a new circumstance and so change happens. The more easily you allow yourself to adapt to this change, the easier life becomes. The harder we hold on to the older comfort zones of our lives, the more stuck we also feel in our ways.

Life is meant to be kind. It helps you grow when you get entangled with outdated modes of perception or limiting patterns of both beliefs and behaviour, by gently bringing about a change in circumstances. This is when for example events unexpectedly unfold differently than you expected. To some, this might appear a bit frightening, disturbing, annoying, or simply frustrating.

Someone else may feel totally overwhelmed by the smallest disruption in the schedule. The way we react to change defines it as either an opportunity for growth or chaos which makes us react as if we are in conflict with the change itself.

Left unchecked at this stage, this behaviour becomes a pattern of responding negatively to changes in circumstances, and we develop a deep imprint in our brain - what neuroscience calls NLP or behavioural structuring. We easily then get used to responding with great anger or despair at any change in what we expect life to be like.

Life, however, does not allow for stagnancy for anyone, anywhere.

Your ability to move with the flow of life defines whether you can remain centred in the midst of any storm, literally or figuratively. Just like 'life is a constant change' is a paradox, yet it is a law of nature, similarly, 'flow, so that you remain in equilibrium' is an internal law of nature that is a guarantee to be equanimous or have inner peace and calm. Just like maintaining your breath rhythm while running, this is maintaining balance with whatever experiences life brings your way.

In that, the chaos is not conflicting but shows you how life itself is your best friend. This is one of the greatest secrets to being heart-conscious or experiencing true happiness.

A greater love for yourself ensues therefrom. This is also called agape consciousness or the greatest extent of self-worth, self-love, and self-awareness as being love itself as a human, in the image of divinity. TWS & its school TFH-VC, teach many people the ability to be heart-conscious lovers. We conduct workshops & seminars towards agape or heart consciousness, with the hope and aspiration to create communities of heart conscious living everywhere in the world.

Stay happy. Stay healed. Stay kind to yourself above all. You are always beloved.

(The author is founder and personal transformation coach of The White Space)

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